Ruts, slumps, and finding your way out.

Let's get real here for a minute. I hope you don't mind. I want to talk about what a hard thing it is to be completely real when you're trying to create a social media presence. For me, this blog is a happy place. I never want it to become a place of complaining, or sad times. But in real life we have ruts and slumps. Sometimes the sun just doesn't shine as bright. That's a universal truth to everybody's life. So how do you be real without totally bumming out your readers? Because being real is a big thing for me on the blog too. I don't ever want you to think that my life is perfect, or that my child is perfect, or that I'm a rockstar parent- because I am not, she is not, it is not.

I decided that maybe the best way to confront this issue on the blog, is to not complain in the dark phase, but talk about the light once you've found it. To say, hey! moms! Last week, when you didn't want to get out of bed to fix breakfast, and you sat your kid in front of the tv with a bowl of popcorn at 11 am, and you felt like a failure because the moms you follow on instagram got up at 6:30 am and made egg in a hole in the shape of hearts and smiley faces for their kids, followed by an educational activity afterwards... yeah... so what. you still deserve mom of the year. Do you know why? Because your kid knows you love them. Because you DID feed them and cuddle them, and got over yourself to carry on for another day even though it could've been so easy to not to. Because maybe you lost your cool and snapped at that sweet face when she purposefully poured her milk all over the dog, but you hugged her and told her how much you loved her after she looked at you with teary eyes and you realized what a fart you were being. 

hypothetically. 

The past month, I have been in such a rut. It didn't last for a day, or a week- a whole month. It's not the first time either. Sometimes life is hard and there's not much you can do about it. So how do you get out of your rut? Honestly. I don't know. I can't give you a list to fix it. But here's what I did:

Today I woke up and got Fern ready for school. Instead of going back to bed to sleep the day away and not think about anything, I took a shower. I got dressed. No T-shirts today. Even though the laundry was dirty because I hadn't done it in a week, I pulled out those skinny jeans I hadn't worn in months & I got the wedges off of the dusty top shelf. I did my makeup. Lipstick ya'll. I think this process was a really important part of my day. I think dressing up and looking pretty for nobody can be so therapeutic. I felt good. (probably because I couldn't smell myself anymore...) I got ready for me today. Because when you do that, it's automatically a present to yourself; a gentle reminder that I do care. 

I gathered my computer and headed to the nearest coffee shop where I indulged in a cappuccino while making a list. (because that's fun to me.) My list included dreams and wishes. (as they usually do) This one was titled: "What kind of woman I want to be." This is something that can get really tricky if you set your standards really high and don't have grace with yourself. So before you make this list, keep in mind that it's something to wake up for in the morning and strive for- not something unattainable to fail at and then beat yourself up over. Enjoy the process. Be who you want to be. 

Then I got out my calendar, and made a list of activities I wanted to do with Fern. It's so easy to get into ruts when there's nothing to do. I think if I plan ahead and have my schedule ahead of time, I can prepare myself for the day ahead of time and have something to look forward to. Plus, when we're spending time together and enjoying activities, we're both in better moods. If you're in OKC, a GREAT source for finding things to do (much of the time free things to do) is Metro Family Magazine. They have a calendar section that has family activities around the city every day all day long. I've been planning much better with the help of that. Before we just ate fro-yo and went to the library. (which is awesome too) 

I guess, reflecting back on everything, my message to you in the rut, is this: It's not anybody else's job to pull you out of that rut you're stuck in. You can't just sleep away the days until something happens. God knows I've tried. You need to get up. take a shower. put on a flowy dress and lipstick (cause it's spring) and take a day to yourself to reflect on the future and the type of person you want to be. Make sure you're treating yourself while you do so, that's real important too. I think we all get so busy we forget who we are, or even sometimes what we're doing here. What the point of it all is. We live day to do day just going through the routine, and we fall into ruts. We ALL need time for ourselves. Just a few hours to take deep breaths and get our heads straight. Dream a little. Plan a vacation. Plan to mark something off of your bucket list. Make a bucket list. 

And then if you have leftover time, go home and pour yourself a glass of wine and drop that bath bomb in the tub you've been saving since last mothers day. You deserve it. 

Also. I think it's really important to start living for yourself a little. YES. Every breath I take is for my daughter; My purpose in life is to raise her well and give her a happy healthy life. YES. My husband rocks my world. I want to be there for him and dress up for him. I aim to make him happy and proud to be my husband. I dress up for him & cook for him and buy him Notorious B.I.G. on vinyl sometimes because he's the jam to my peanut butter. These are all GREAT things. But I forget to live for myself too. Somedays you want to drop kick that sweet little angel face of a daughter you have and your husband works all day and then goes to a Thunder game, so there's just not anybody to get ready for. Those are the days it's hardest, but most important to remember that you still have yourself. You still need to do things for you. You are important.

Toddler Surgery: Adenoid removal + tubes

As many of you who follow along with me on facebook, twitter or instagram know: Fern had her adenoids removed Wednesday & tubes put in. The surgery couldn't have gone better. I'm so thankful for doctors who communicated well & proceeded quickly, a husband who was available and supportive consistently through the day and family and friends who sent texts, phone calls & messages our way all day & the days leading up to the surgery,  checking on Fern. It really helped distract me.

I know that having your adenoids removed isn't a big deal. Tubes are even less of a big deal. Super common surgeries. Even sitting in the waiting room were 3 other kids around Fern's age getting tubes that day as well. That being said- you can't tell a mom not to worry. We worry when they spend their first night away from home, we worry when they start eating solid foods, we worry that somebody babysitting won't see them stick their fingers in light sockets.. so it's only natural to worry about surgery, no matter how common or minor it is.

As I mentioned, I had a great team of doctors, nurses and surgeons who comforted me, explained things well and never once made me feel like I was over-reacting when I'd tear up at the thought of her being on a surgery table. I thought that I might pass along the information I learned in case anybody reading this has to go through this in the future. You can find information everywhere, but sometimes it's just comforting to hear it from other mom's experiences. Here's what I learned:

Fern has not always had ear infections. In fact, she just started getting them around September. I don't know what changed, but something did.
There's a tube connecting your ears, nose and throat called the eustachian tube. The eustachian tube should drain any fluid that gets in your ears. If the fluid stays in the ears without draining it can turn to puss which causes ear infections. When you have an ear infection; the antibiotics prescribed actually turn the puss back into liquid so it can drain properly.

source

Tubes are put in after several (and I do mean several) continuous ear infections. Tubes are a surgically inserted way for that fluid to drain out if it hasn't been draining out properly through the eustachian tube. Fern had them consistently since September. Sometimes they would both be infected, sometimes one would be infected. Sometimes there would be no infection, but there would still be fluid in her ears, which is better than infection- but still not super awesome. This is when the doctor started talking about seeing an ENT (Ear Nose & Throat) doctor to have a better look & see if tubes were the way to go.

source

After going to the ENT & having a hearing test done, it was confirmed that tubes would be the right way to go. Her eardrums weren't moving at all during the test, which I was informed meant that there was probably still a good deal of fluid in there. I mentioned that Tristan had to have his adenoids removed when he was small due to sleep apnea. I wasn't sure if this is something that could be passed down. He said it was. (Fern does not have sleep apnea, though she's always snored) Upon looking at her adenoids he was certain they were the main problem. Her adenoids were blocking about 80% of her eustachian tube, which is why the fluid couldn't drain properly. Even if tubes were inserted, he was certain that without the removal of the adenoids, Ear infections would start up again after the tubes were removed. (tubes only stay in for up to 1 year)

The whole process went pretty quickly. I was given advice by several people for the surgery and after such as:
Stock up on "soft diet" foods ie: yoghurt, eggs, smoothy ingredients, etc. It's common for their throats to be sore after surgery.
Ask to be with them while they're being sedated: I asked, but at our surgery center they couldn't grant this request for safety reasons for both you and the child. I guess they've had parents pass out before. But I was told to ask, so maybe some places will let you. This was honestly the worst part of the whole thing for me. Fern is so attached and screamed as they took her away from me. She didn't know them, and she didn't want to go with them without me.
Send comfort:  One of Fern's teachers got her a little present to open before she went into surgery. It was a little stuffed lamb to hold through the whole procedure. After the procedure is finished they'll come get you as soon as they can, but it was good to know she had something of comfort to hold onto while she was waiting for us.
Cold Drink: The hospital was ready with juice box & popsicle to soothe her little throat afterwards. I'd recommend bringing a sippy cup to put it in. She was a little out of it still and didn't quite "get" the concept of the straw, nor did she have the patience to figure it out.

We got to sit with Fern up until they were ready to take her back for the procedure. They took her. She cried. I cried. Tristan comforted me. The entire procedure lasted about 20 minutes. (Just long enough for my scalding tea to cool enough to drink) The doctor met with us and told us how well she did. He warned us that kids are ALWAYS really grumpy right after surgery when the anesthesia is still wearing off, so don't be worried about that. (and she was. very grumpy) She got ear-drops to use 3 times a day for 3 days. When we were able to see her she just wanted out of there. The nurses gave us some basic instruction and answered any questions we had while removing the IV in her hand (super sad- she's still pretty bruised). We went straight home where Fern immediately insisted on watching "Monsters University" (more commonly known at our house as "monsters")

Once we were home Fern's mood was worlds better. She cuddled up on the couch with me, her bunny & her sippy cup. (very important to keep them hydrated) We watched an episode of Paw Patrol before turning the channel to "monsters". Fern and I both fell asleep 20 minutes in. I woke up to Mike chasing a pig who had stolen his hat & relocated Fern and myself to my bed for some comfy napping and cuddling. She snored SO LOUD. The doctor said this would happen because she'd be a little swollen. She was also a little congested for the same reasons. After naptime she woke up and had scrambled eggs and yoghurt. Tristan skipped school that evening and took us out for tacos & fro-yo. Apart from being exhausted from the day, she was totally back to normal. I'm so thankful for that.

The restoring powers of Sunday

I love Sundays. I love Sundays because I always get time with my two favorite people in the WORLD. Plus the weather is AMAZING right now, and we can play and laugh outside, and breathe fresh air, and be silly, and smell like dirt and sweat, and fun. aaah. Sunday is my drink of cool water, it's what energizes me for the week to come. Because being a stay at home mom is hard, and honsetly, by the time the weekend comes I'm just barely hanging on. 

I read this post on "asking the right questions" by Momastery. This particular paragraph felt like she was speaking through my soul. 

"When Craig returned each day at 6:00 he’d walk through the door, smile, and say– “So! How was your day?”This question was like a spotlight pointed directly at the  chasm between his experience of a “DAY” and my experience of a “DAY.”  How was my day?The question would linger in the air for a moment while I stared at Craig and the baby shoved her hand in my mouth like they do –  while the oldest screamed MOMMY I NEED HELP POOING from the bathroom and the middle one cried in the corner because I NEVER EVER EVER let her drink the dishwasher detergent. NOT EVER EVEN ONCE, MOMMY!!! And I’d look down at my spaghetti stained pajama top, unwashed hair, and gorgeous baby on my hip – and my eyes would wander around the room, pausing to notice the toys peppering the floor and the kids’ stunning new art on the fridge . . .
And I’d want to say:
How was my day? Today has been a lifetime. It was the best of times and the worst of times. There were moments when my heart was so full I thought I might explode, and there were other moments when my senses were under such intense assault that I was CERTAIN I’d explode. I was both lonely and absolutely desperate to be alone. I was saturated- just BOMBARDED with touch and then the second I put down this baby I yearned to smell her sweet skin again. I was simultaneously bored out of my skull and completely overwhelmed with so much to do. Today was too much and not enough. It was loud and silent. It was brutal and beautiful. I was at my very best today and then, just a moment later, at my very worst. At 3:30 today I decided that we should adopt four more children, and then at 3:35 I decided that we should give up the kids we already have for adoption. Husband – when your day is completely and totally dependent upon the moods and needs and schedules of tiny, messy, beautiful rug rats your day is ALL OF THE THINGS and NONE OF THE THINGS, sometimes within the same three minute period. But I’m not complaining. This is not a complaint, so don’t try to FIX IT. I wouldn’t have my day Any.Other.Way. I’m just saying- it’s a hell of a hard thing to explain- an entire day with lots of babies"

Right?!?!  spot on. and I only have one. One that I am SO eternally grateful for... a whole lot of the time.

Here's to making it to Sunday.

purple hair. red lips. closed shoppe. new home. oil pulling.

It's so strange, it was only Monday when I announced that I was "slowing down a bit". In the 3 days between then and now, I feel there's so much I need to update you on.

+ First of all, my hair is preeeeeetty lavender now. (as requested)  I'm pretty much in love with it completely and may never change it again. Except to grow it out. My goal is to have lavender mermaid hair. (also it inspired me to buy red-lipstick, which has never looked good on me, but I have to admit I LOVE IT!)

+ The shoppe is now closed until further notice. I put the last 5 cloud mobiles up for sale, and after they sold (the very next day!!) I put 'er on vacation mode. I'm not sad yet, because I'm buried in orders I have to get out, but once there's a calm and no more orders, I know I'll really miss it. I'm excited to finish my class so that I can have time to re-open the shop. Plus I'm planning a new addition to the shoppe for when it re-opens, and I can't wait to have some fresh things to offer you. It's a good and exciting season indeed.

+ I re-budgeted, as I mentioned I needed to do. I love budgeting. holy cow, being organized is like a drug for me. Due to our extreme organization, and budgeting skills- we'll be looking for a new house to rent this spring/summer! You CAN'T know how excited I am about that. Our very own space? Hallelujah!

+ T & I are trying this oil pulling thing that's ALL THE RAGE right now. Seriously. In one day I feel like I went from never hearing of it before to seeing it eeeeeverywhere. I've done some asking around and reading up, and I really can't see any negative to trying it. So we're going to give it a whirl. I'll update you on how it works for us after we've used it for a week. Have any of you tried it before?


I think that's about all the updating I have for today. Off to work on orders!

I like that I blogged today because I wanted to, and not because I needed to. It's a great day.

Reminiscing over the past five years

 2009

So, I guess when you get married- you're technically suppose to stop "celebrating" your dating anniversary, but I do just want to acknowledge it. Because it's a big deal. Tristan and I just celebrated our fifth anniversary of the day he asked me to be his girlfriend yesterday. We didn't really DO anything to celebrate, but it's a sweet day to just talk to each other and reminisce about the last five years. My favorite part of dating anniversaries is asking Tristan to tell me the story of him asking me. Every year. I'll keep doing it forever and ever, because I want him to have it down PAT to tell to Fern when she's older. I like the parts he puts in about how we'd been hanging out for a long time before and were basically dating already, but he was still so nervous to ask me. I also like the part he puts in about asking me "officially" over text, and me turning him down, and telling him he needed to ask me in person. atta girl. pat my own back. ;) Reminiscing is so much fun. I was just listening to John Tesh the other day (who I get MOST of my life advice from) and he was just talking about how great reminiscing about the good times with your significant other helps you get over the hard times so much faster, and helps grow and strengthen your relationship. It's so true. Five years of great memories is such a wonderful thing to go back and remember together. Laughing at silly things that happened. It's like going back and re-living that great time together. I'm so excited for next year, and 10 years.. AND WEDDING ANNIVERSARIES!  anniversaries are so great.

2013

Let's talk about lies.

In December, I got an email from Ashely, who runs a social media movement called Overcome the Lie.  Their mission is to "empower a generation of women to overcome the lie because Jesus overcame the grave". Overcome the Lie is doing their 2nd annual blog tour right now, and I've been asked to take part in it. I was so honored to be asked. Ashley asked me to "'believe that your words are going to make the difference for someone", and let me tell you, since she asked me to believe that, Satan immediately started telling me the lie that nobody would connect with my story. He's tricky.

I started thinking about lies; more specifically the lies that we believe every day. I think that since we're our own worst critics, we entertain lies about ourselves more easily than lies about others, which is why Satan whispers them so quietly in our ears. The more you listen to a lie, the more truth you start seeing in that lie, even if there's no truth to be found in it. You start shaping your view of things around that lie, until you believe it whole heartedly and you don't even realize it's a lie you're believing. You simply think "that's just the way it is". I believe that every single corruption in the world comes from the root of a lie that somebody has believed.

I've been thinking about this post for over a month, trying to decide if what I had to say was the right the thing to say. I've never been so stressed about a post. Not because I'm worried of what you're going to think of me, or that I won't reach anybody with it, but because it means a lot to me. I could write about lies we all believe about our looks, our weight, our clothes. I could write about how I compare myself to other blog moms on the daily, and I just don't know why my life isn't as bright and shiny as Naomi's (how does she do it?), and why can't I DIY everything, and be a perfect housewife, and keep my nails perfectly manicured while hand cutting every valentine for Fern's V-day party next month... I could write about all of that. But I suspect that those are things we all deal with, and we're very aware of. 

I decided to tell you about the lie I believed about my role as a woman in the church. I grew up in a conservative church. Not the most conservative, I mean, I didn't have to wear a dress to worship, and our ministers let us clap to the upbeat songs, but still.. very conservative. One of the beliefs my church followed was that a woman's role in the church was under a mans. A man is the leader of the church, as he is in his marriage. Women are allowed to teach children's classes, or lead women's retreats, but women are not to lead a prayer in worship, or teach a class with men present. Women are not allowed to lead singing, or be a minister, or an elder, or a youth minister. Women are not to hold any leadership role in the church. 

I know what you're thinking, right? In a 21st century, equal rights, women can do anything men can do, world.. yeah. I know what you're thinking. But before you start trying to find out the location of this church so you can picket it topless for equal rights, let me urge you to keep in mind: The church is not the enemy here. I respect the views of the church I grew up in. No, I don't agree with them, but I know where their heart is in the matter and I assure you, it's not to belittle women or treat them like they're lesser. They don't teach that. They don't teach that, but that's what Satan started whispering in my ear. I know plenty of women in that church who are amazing leaders, and still stay within the boundaries of the beliefs of that church. So let's not place blame there. That's just another lie Satan will try to tell you to get you to a hate an entire denomination of his followers. No sir. We won't do that. 

When I was 17 & 18 years old I spent my summer in Guyana, South America helping the poor be treated by doctors in a medical camp. I trained for 9 months after I graduated High School to be sent out with a team to another country to minister to them for 18 months. I went to New Zealand. The whole time I was doing these things, Satan was whispering to me, that I'm a woman and I'm wasting my time. I can't pray with that person, I can't teach this person. After years of hearing that, I believed it. I came back home from New Zealand, defeated. Feeling like, I made some great friendships there, but on a spiritual level, maybe I should give up missions. 

I left the church I grew up in after returning from New Zealand, but I have yet to find a church family. I've been home for 6 years. After several years of visiting churches who believe that women can, and should be leaders, I realized the lie I had been believing all that time. After being in these churches, I realized how hard it was for me to overcome, which is probably why I still haven't committed myself to a church yet. (despite finding several wonderful ones) After a while of not being in community, and not feeling like I could be an active member of the church, I started believing the lie that God wasn't listening to me at all, even when I was alone. I stopped praying. I believed in God, but I didn't believe that I was a person of significance to Him. I still have to give myself speeches before praying to work myself up to do it. It's work. It takes a lot of effort for me to hang on to my beliefs, and I believe that's because Satan is still torturing me with those lies. Sometimes I still listen. 

 I don't believe that everyone is made to get up on the stage and lead a sermon. I don't like the attention being on me at all, as a matter of fact. But do you know what I DO want to do? I want have a normal conversation with my God wherever I want without having to schedule it, and remind myself that I'm allowed to talk to him. I want to go over to somebody who has a heart full of hurt, and I want to respectfully ask them if they'd like for me to pray for them, and then I want to pray for them. out loud. even if it's a man. I want be involved in serving my community. I don't mean just going, I want to be a leader in that. I want to set up, and take down, and bring food, or whatever. I want to have the ideas. I want to be active, and I want to be healed of being crippled by lies. Especially the lie that a woman's place in the church is quietly tucked away in the corners. Knowing the lie, isn't the same as overcoming the lie. Overcoming the lie, I've learned, can be a process. I have yet to overcome this lie, but I'm working on it. It's important to me, because I know I'm the example my daughter has, and I'm responsible for calling out the lies that she may hear, and I SURE don't want to be the inspiration for the lies she hears. 

Last year I prayed in a small group of friends. A man was present. That's when I began to overcome the lie. I'm still working on my personal prayer life. We still aren't plugged in to a church. 

I know we all have different lies that we believe, and whether or not you believe they're from Satan, or Santa, well that's for you to decide.. I'm not really in the business of convincing you to believe in my God today.. I just want people, who believe in everything or nothing, to stop believing in lies. Regardless of where they come from. Or at least, be aware of lies that you're being told. I want anyone to be able to recognize a lie that they're listening to, to call it out as what it is, and speak against it. That's not religious talk, it's just healthy. 

Also, I think that these lies I've been believing have attributed to my severe state of introvert, and I just don't connect with people like I once did. I find it hard talking to people, and making friends is nearly impossible. I have a lot of friendly acquaintances at best, and a few that've stuck around since high school, God bless 'em. Despite this, I'm a great friend. I really am! Just letting you know that if you have lies you're struggling with, and maybe if you want to talk about them, even if they have nothing at all to do with the lies I've been believing, email me! We'll talk a bout them. I'll be your friend! Like for real friend, not like.. "I'm a blogger and I'll reply to your email after I get done instagraming my favorite coffee mug", but like seriously, email me. We'll talk. I'll give you my number. We'll text and encourage each other and you can look at the moon while I'm looking at the moon and we'll know we're looking at the same moon kind of friends. I'm THAT good of a friend. ;) 

Also, Connect with Overcome the Lie! What a great organization. What a great way to get to know, and encourage other women who are overcoming lies. I love this organization! Connect with them via the links provided below:

website | twitter | facebook | instagram | pinterest

Life Lately:

Hi readers! I hope everybody had a wonderful Thanksgiving. I took it upon myself to just leave the blog be for the holidays and spend time with my family. Now that things are settling back down (for a couple of weeks, anyway) I'm back to blogging! I've got lots on the books for you that I'm really excited about. Like, introducing you to new friends, some reading material, a great Christmas DIY, and more!  I'm sure there's more. I have a list- so I won't forget.

For now, have a peek at some of the treasures I have from my blog break. If you keep up with me on instagram, you may have seen some of these.

1. Smelling the beautiful flowers at cuppies. she always gets REALLY into smelling flowers.
2. Visiting "Aunt Mac" at the Bricktown events center | 3. Thanksgiving with siblings and cousins
4. Marek "Aunt Mac", herself and all of her beautiful pillows at Deluxe.  | 5. Don't download the app that turns your photos into "santa". It will haunt your dreams for nights to come.
6. My sweet husband took my grandpa to the Thunder game last Friday. So sweet! love these men!
7. Currently we MUST watch our shows with every doll available. | 8. Tristan's grandmother, Fern and I at my brother-in-law's wedding!


It's been such a great week! Wow, looking back through all of these photos, we've seen so many loved ones and celebrated so much. I love it!

I hope your Thanksgiving was fantastic and you got to spend it with all of your favorite people as well!



P.S. I'm so honored to be able to mark of #25 of my 30 before 30 list. Meg of Rivers and Roads posted an interview about my shoppe yesterday! You can go read it here!

Life Lately: busy schedules and more change.

Hi friends! I feel a little bit guilty, as all of my posts as of lately have been about giveaways and sponsors and events and lists and pretty things. Although those are all TERRIFIC, and obviously, I wouldn't post them if I didn't love them, I've just been pretty preoccupied and haven't been able to be very present, on a personal level, for you. Our family is going through a lot of changes at the moment. Not only have we gotten married, and moved out of our room mates' house;  I've also recently put my car up for sale, and put in my notice at Cuppies. It's such a bittersweet thing. I've loved loved LOVED working at Cuppies & Joe for the past (nearly) 3 years. The owners of this beautiful cupcake and coffee shop are like family. They're such wonderful examples of the type of business person I want to be, as well as the type of mother, daughter, encourager, and hostess I want to be. These people, along with all of my co-workers have just adopted me as family since the day I started, and continue to do that with every new employee they hire. They've taken such good care of me and blessed our family with so many things; from flat tire fixes to celebrations, they've been there for it all. I'm so sad to not be part of the Cuppies employees, but I'm so happy that I'll always be part of the Cuppies family.

That's the bitter part, now for the sweet part.

Tristan and I have been talking about what I'd like to pursue as a career, and although making coffee is absolutely something I love (and will continue to consume on a daily basis), I have other dreams that will allow me to better provide for my family. After the holiday season, I'll be working towards getting my real estate license. This is something I've always been very interested it, I just never knew where to start. Somehow the stars have aligned and everything is falling into place. God has placed some great women in my life who are taking me under their wings, and letting me learn under them. Which is exactly what I needed.  This career choice will not only provide for my family better financially, but also on a personal level. This will allow me to make my own schedules, and I'll still be able to stay with Fern during the day, and be with my family at night. It's been a very hard year since I went back to work. My schedule is almost exactly opposite of T's.

If you could just say a little prayer for our family, or send happy thoughts, good vibes, Buddha belly rubs, or pennies in wishing wells.. whatever it is that you find helpful... We'd really appreciate it. I'm excited, but so nervous about getting into something I don't know much about. Starting something new after being in a very comfortable position for the last 3 years.

My friend Tillie said something to me the other day that struck me as quite funny. She said "For someone who dislikes change, you handle it so lovely." It actually hadn't occured to me until she said that how much change we've actually gone through this past year. Just our living situation alone. We've had 4 different addresses in the past 12 months. I don't know how much more I can handle, but I have a feeling we're not quite near the end yet. :)
What's that old country song? "The only thing that stays the same is that everything changes".. ("everything chay-ay-ay-nges")

Here's to a more consistent (at least) lifestyle.

joined together, forever.

Here are some sweet photos from our wedding. I'm basically re-posting these photos from our wedding photographer's blog because I haven't received our CD with all of our photos on it, and I'm much too impatient to wait for it to come. I've already waited THIS long to share them. I find that very impressive.

Our wedding was perfect. It was at my grandparents house in the country, where I grew up. It was a romantic evening wedding. Just a tad of chill in the air. The sun sat as we said our vows and afterwards we went into the pasture and celebrated with all of our loved ones with campfire, dancing, and libations to warm us. We wanted our entire wedding to have a very community feel. We set the tables up in a large circle(ish) shape so we could all enjoy one another and the dance floor was in the center. For dinner, I asked everyone to bring a dish of any sort. We had such a fantastic turnout. It couldn't have gone better. I'm so thankful The Hibben's were there to capture it all. 

I didn't snag all of the photos from the photographers blog, but I snagged many of them. So if you'd like to go see a few more you can head here. 

Our weekend / Life lately

I am getting frazzled, ya'll. Our wedding is NEXT WEEKEND! I don't necessarily have a ton of things to do (I think) But even that makes me feel crazy, and like I'm totally missing something really important and big.
I may have mentioned before that because of our schedules, Tristan and I rarely get to spend quality time together lately. I can't wait for the honeymoon. Just to be able to spend an ENTIRE 5 DAYS with my husband, and only him. It's been so long. Even though we live together, I really start to miss him sometimes.
We try to make Sundays our usual day to spend together, but even then, we have church, and sometimes he plays soccer, or basketball. I deliver teepees, or need to finish up orders from the shoppe.. Nothing really ever goes according to plan, does it?
This weekend we did pretty well, I must say. We didn't get to do everything we planned, but we did pretty good. We even got to stop in to a new shoppe in this area called "Dutch" (which I just know you'd all be in love with) to get Tristan's mom some housewarming flowers.  Anyway. here are a few photos "according to my iphone" of the past weekend and the time we got to spend together. (and the BEAUTIFUL arrangement by Dutch) (the deliver, btw- all you locals)

1. 2. Sweet Arrangement by Dutch
3.  I made my first 6 ft teepee, isn't it so cute and small? <3  These are now available for rent as well as for sale. Photographers love that.
4. Beautiful Succulents by The Plant Shoppe via The Hub.
5. Our walk with Harper. Fern is so darn independent. It's so terrifying, but golly it's cute.
6.  Fern's new way of watching Sesame Street. Lazy. 7. Autumn is here!
8.  MY new baby from The Plant Shoppe